Whole Foods is the go-to when it comes to the latest health craze.
If it’s kale, you better believe that you’ll see kale in everything. Did quinoa decide to come back into our lives? Look for it in some form on every shelf.
That’s one thing that Whole Foods has always been good at: Having a finger on the health-food pulse no matter what the gluten-free flavor of the week happens to be.
The health food mega-chain is a trend-setter. They know if they exercise their right to put ridiculous products on the shelf, we’ll gobble them right up. They aren’t exactly the most price-conscious place on Earth though.
We all know that “a bargain” isn’t what we’re looking for at Whole Foods, even if they do rock a great sale every now and again. We want a variety of healthy food and we want it now, because we’re American consumers and patience is not one of our strongest traits.
I’ll be the first to admit that I like Whole Foods. I love their salad bar and hot food bar. I love it too much, in fact. I’ll blow $20 on lunch there and not bat an eyelash until I realize I just paid for pizza by the pound. That’s right, pizza by the pound.
I’m not the only one that loves them, though. You love them, too, and so do Millennials — and Whole Foods is very aware of it. And the company takes advantage of it on the shelves. And Whole Foods is extremely good at what it does.
1: This Is Infused with … That?
2: They’re Really “a Head” of the Game Here
3: This One Is Quite the Rub
4:They Beet You to This One
5: They Need to Chill with these Labels
6: No Recipe Has Ever Called for These. Ever.
7:Well at Least Your Decorations are Healthy
8: I Think This Is More Than the Street Value
9: These Don’t Even Taste Good
10: This Is Just Nuts
Jonas is a stand up comedian, writer, podcast host and frequent SiriusXM guest based out of New York, NY. He has been performing and writing for almost a decade and he can be seen performing every week in NYC.
You may have heard him on SiriusXM FIGHT CLUB, The Bob Levy Show, The War Stories Podcast, Hammerfisting and various other podcast & radio appearances. He's performed at The New York Comedy Festival in 2015 and The Bumbershoot Music & Arts Festival in 2013 & 2014.
You can follow Jonas on Twitter @JonasBarnes and see where he's performing next at JonasSized.com